This is a public warning Be careful when you're out We are having freaky weather There's a lot of it about On the terraces is it swinging He's a monkey on the roof You've seen him on the telly So let me introduce you're host tonight T.o.p.m.a.n. He's naughty by nature T.o.p.m.a.n. On doubles and chasers T.o.p.m.a.n. Guilette or a razor T.o.p.m.a.n. Shooting guns on the high street of love In a crowd it's hard to spot him But anonymity can cost He's never cheap or cheerful He's hugo and he's boss He's riding through the desert on a camel light And on a magic carpet he'll fly away tonight Open sesame T.o.p.m.a.n. He's naughty by nature T.o.p.m.a.n. On doubles and chasers T.o.p.m.a.n. Guilette or a razor T.o.p.m.a.n. Shooting guns on the high street of love T.o.p.m.a.n. Sees her in double T.o.p.m.a.n. Then pukes on the pavement T.o.p.m.a.n. Likes her all clean and shaven T.o.p.m.a.n. Shooting guns on the high street of love T.o.p.m.a.n. He's naughty by nature T.o.p.m.a.n. On doubles and chasers T.o.p.m.a.n. Guilette or a razor T.o.p.m.a.n. Shooting guns on the high street of love T.o.p.m.a.n. Shooting guns on the high street of love T.o.p.m.a.n. Shooting guns on the high street of love