Hey mister, where you headed Are you in a hurry I need a lift to happy hour Say oh no Do you break for distilled spirits I need a break as well The well that inebriates the guilt One, two, one, two, three, four Cold turkey's getting stale Tonight I'm eating crow Fermented salmonella Poison oak no There's a drought a the fountain of youth Now I'm dehydrating My tongue is swelling up I say one, two, one, two, three, four Troubled times You know I cannot lie I'm off the wagon and I'm hitching a ride There's a drought at the fountain of youth Now I'm dehydrating My tongue is swelling up I say...........SHITE!!!