Cher: The Unauthorized Rusical (feat. The Cast of RuPaul's Drag Race, Season 10)

3AM, Malibu Can't sleep... Bed emoji Kathy Griffin just left, that bitch got me all wired up Sticking out tongue and winking emoji 50 years in the biz, Can't stop thinking about when it all began Thought bubble emoji Born in Cali and mama named me Cherilyn I was insecure, but there was a fire within Skipped school early and went to Hollywood Tried to meet every big wig that I could When I met Sonny he was twenty seven I was younger by a few years Okay, eleven Short little guy but he stole my heart Soon we were on top of the charts (Sang songs) We were were riding the hits It was all glamour and glitz (Sang songs) We were two shooting stars And we had each other babe Sonny believed in me more than I believed in myself And bitch, we were just getting started From television city in Hollywood: It's the Sonny and Cher Show! (Yes, she's on tv [?]) Me and Sonny were the hottest show in town and they loved us! (Yes, she's on tv [?]) And every Monday night the fans stuck around To see my Mackie gowns My Daddy's people were Armenian And I would dress up like an Indian I wore a headdress, be a gypsy queen A fortune telling witch from New Orleans (Cultural appropriation!) That's one we never heard (Cultural appropriation!) That wasn't even a word (Cultural appropriation!) C'mon, it was another time We just called it fashion bitch, we evolved with the times This tv queen, she hit the scene Divorcing Sonny, and getting good rocker beat (Good, good, good rocker beat) And now I'm with Geffen, when he was young I even let Gene Simmons slip me the tongue (Single lady danced all night) And burned the candle at both ends (The way of love, is a twisted trip) But I'd do it again No regrets dammit! Tv's gone Moving on There's just one thing that's left for me to do (Disco Cher) Ride the trend, to the end Throw on disco duds and boogie shoes (Disco Cher) Make some hits, flash my tits! God, I gotta stop wearing all this cheap crap (Disco Cher) Ride this wave (Ride this wave) To my grave (To my grave) This disco craze will last forever (Ha Ha Ha) Gotta do whatever it takes Even wear roller skates This era was a bumpy section Seems like I might need a new direction I didn't know what to do next So I called Sonny on the set of 'Fantasy Island' He told me to believe in myself, go into acting and snap out of it! Cue the track Your career hits the skids, and you're, busy with kids (Snap out of it!) When Altman, offers you a scene In 'Come back Jimmy Dean' (Snap out of it!) Finally! More roles come if you ask Like the, break in Mormon Mass (Snap out of it!) Just snap out of it! (snap out of it) You know what I'm gonna do? Play a witch in Eastwick, I don't need a damn broomstick (Snap out of it!) Snap, I screwed up all those words Then get struck by the moon Slap Nic Cage, make him swoon Snap out of it bitches! I won an Oscar dammit! Okay, now what? Got tired of starring in the same old movie So I stripped with sailors on the MTV (MTV!) They wouldn't stop with the tabloid headlines No-one had ever seen an ass like mine (ass like mine) But I was only getting started In new adventures yet uncharted I got in amazing shape, and sold a fitness tape (Don't turn your back on Cher) Don't turn your back baby Ho! Til' my bank balance, is longer than my hair (Don't do it) Don't turn your back on Cher (Don't turn your back on Cher) Got tattoos everywhere (Got tattoos everywhere) And thanks to my hustle I'm a billionaire, ho! In breaking news, Sonny Bono has passed away unexpectedly With Sonny gone, I didn't have anyone around to believe in Me. So I needed to believe in myself, ho! How am I supposed to cope? (She can't cope) I Cher am gonna miss that dope (Bye-bye, Sonny) But since he's not around I need a brand new sound! Vocoder, something I can believe The answer is technology Vocoder, a new trick up my sleeve Turn into a robot from outer space! And I know the gays will buy this And I know Britney will try this Now my legacy's secure Time to do another Cher-well Tour I invented reinvention, bitches When our world is destroyed and the end of time approaches Two things will be left Cher and cockroaches! Cher and roaches, cockroaches and Cher When all else is gone, we'll still be there Cher and roaches, cockroaches and Cher Get used to us, we ain't going nowhere Wagon Wheel Watusi! (Unintelligible) Go talk to my agent!