That's it Looking back now, I didn't know what it was supposed to be And it's like raising kids, man If you weren't raised, you don't know how to raise, you know? I just did the best that I could with them because They know fuckin' well I love them But I didn't do the best I could I didn't know what the fuck I was doing I didn't I will never forget watching my mother get put in a straightjacket And taken out of my home when I was only seven years old She was diagnosed with Dementia praecox and put in a mental institution Leaving my daddy alone with me and my little brother Lloyd I latеr had an evil stepmother who furthеr cemented the idea that I didn't need a mother Growing up without one had long lasting influence I didn't fully understand until much later in life It bled into my relationships with family and those I had become romantically involved with Whenever I got too close to a woman, I would cut her off Part of that was vindictive and partially based on fear But it was also totally subconscious Looking back is a bitch, isn't it